Talking self responsibility for feelings

Today I came across this quote:


“I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”


It sounds like a statement of self responsibility – about who you are to others – yet this is a deceptive statement as it is based on the assumption that you are responsible for how another feels – that anyone is responsible for how another feels. Does it really work like that? Is anybody in this world responsible for your feelings, but you? No – you have created the point – and another is merely stimulating it, impulsing it.


Thus what is the apparent statement of self responsibility in this sentence – it is actually a statement of ownership, implied and accepted tacitly that ‘the way it works’ – that this person owns you, has control over you. Why would we want to believe this? Why would we assume to believe that others are responsible for how we feel and experience ourselves? It is self defeating – it is taking away self responsibility from the individual and it is a statement of blame and justification.


I’d suggest that we do not subscribe to such bullshit but rather take self responsibility for our thoughts, feelings and emotions and rather than wallow stuck in blame and justification in how apparently others are to blame for ‘what they have done to me’, create an experience for ourselves wherein we are the directive principle within our own life – firstly through forgiving that which we have created ourselves as – beings who falls easy pray to our own mental constructs which then make us weak to the influences and actions of others.


To learn how to become the directive principle within your own life, learn more about self forgiveness at


About adrianblackburn

I am 1 vote for World Equality and an Equal Money System
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2 Responses to Talking self responsibility for feelings

  1. Fascinating point, because one will always try to make others feel comfortable and good with oneself because we have come to believe that we are responsible for how others makes us feel, therefore the point of blame is accepted and allowed by everyone participation within ego personalities that states that we have allowed ourselves to blame another if they don´t makes us feel accepted or appreciated because it should be the responsibility of another to accept us and recognizes us as part of the group, denying to realize the responsibility for accept oneself and embrace self

  2. Thanks Adrian, great blog, not enter to that bullshit of giving self responsibility away

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